


fever dream

by genes1s



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, alternate universe - simulation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-28
Updated: 2020-10-27
Packaged: 2021-03-07 01:48:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 15,282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26159059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/genes1s/pseuds/genes1s
Summary: Levi wakes up. It’s not inside the walls.
Relationships: Levi/Erwin Smith
Comments: 54
Kudos: 141





	1. Chapter 1

The box won’t break.

He slams on the four walls trapping him inside, but the material is unyielding. His knuckles dent more than the box.

“Mr. Ackerman, please calm down.”

The lid opens. He gasps for air.

White light blinds his eyes. For a moment he sees the battlefield, blood flying under the grey sky, crawling over limb after shredded limb. Levi jerks upright and dry heaves over the side.

“You’ve just exited the simulation, Mr. Ackerman. It’ll take a few seconds to adjust.”

Levi snaps his neck from side to side: strange contraptions crafted from metal, pipes and wires crawling over the walls. A man with thinning hair and a white coat peering down his nose.

“Eren. Where -“ Levi chokes. “Where is Eren?”

“You were the last participant to die. Eren and the others woke up not long ago.”

What happened? He was climbing up a pile of bodies to search for Eren’s titan form. He’d lost the rest of his squad hours ago. Where was -

“No longer dizzy? Excellent. The others are gathered for debrief. It’s time for you to join them.”

Levi scrapes his hands around the box ; no swords. His boots are gone too, and his gear. Grey slacks stretch to his bare feet and a white shirt brushes his chin.

He upturns his palms. Old callouses are replaced with smooth skin, free from caked blood and purple bruises. He shoots a hand to his eye - no scar.

“Hey, where the fuck am I?”

“We’ll explain in the debrief.”

“I asked you a question.” Levi pushes out the box and reaches for the man’s neck. His stomach churns the instant he moves. Keeling foward, he clenches the sides of the box until the floor stops shaking.

“Don’t strain yourself. Now get out slowly, and follow me.”

Levi cranes his chin up and scowls. Still, he needs answers

He climbs out and lands on the floor. The box looks like a cylinder. That, or a tomb. He pads ahead of the man and flicks his gaze over the worktops attached to the walls.

Something on the closest bench glints. Levi swipes up the scalpel as he spins around. “Hurry up, then. I don’t know the fucking way.”

“I’d watch your tongue, Ackerman. Your performance was far from satisfactory.”

Levi turns the blade in his palm as the man brushes past. He leads them through a crude white corridor, empty save for the lights lining the walls.

He stops outside a set of double doors. Chatter filters into the corridor.

“After you,” Levi says. The doors swing open.

People are packed into the room, each perched on rows of orderly cots. They huddle together in groups, shoulder to shoulder, eyes jerking left and right. He blinks. Every face is familiar.

Eren sits between Armin and Mikasa, heads tucked together in hushed whisper. Hange’s hands are flying as they chat with a sighing - Moblit? And Nanaba?

And Mike too, slumped against a cot with his knee pulled up. Mike, who’s been dead for years. Levi watched pires burn for most of the soldiers here.

A gold head peaks above them all, hidden at the back of the room. His blood freezes.

The scalpel’s tiny in his hand. It doesn’t stop him from raising it like a sword and charging the old man still standing by the door.

Levi slashes up as the man jerks back, coat staining crimson across his chest. Too shallow - aim for the throat. He shifts his grip and drives down.

Hands tear him away, hurling him onto the ground. Skin burning over the smooth floor, he jerks out his hands and rolls over. Two black clad men stare down at him.

A foot flies into his vision, smashing into his side. The second man joins in to pummel his thighs. Levi spits blood over the perfect floor as his vision spins black.

“Guards, stand down.” The men slink away and take post at the old man’s side.

Levi scrambles to his knees. His tunnel vision carves a path straight though the cots. Erwin stares back at him with eyes wide as dinner plates.

He climbs to his feet and jabs a finger at the old man. “Tell me, right now. What the fuck is going on?”

The man turns around and pulls a clipboard off the wall. The doors burst open.

“Ah, Doctor. Is it debriefing time?” A woman tugs at her ponytail, looking from the old man to the blood spattered floor. “Candidate 17 still volatile, I see?”

“Correct,” says the doctor. “Still no improvements there.”

The woman nods. “Perhaps a contribution to his failure.”

Levi charges her next.

It takes both guards to pin him down. They seize his arms and force him to face the room. Everyone is silent, perched on the edge of their seats and knees bouncing. The doctor straightens his coat.

“Now, if the disturbances are over. Depending on when you exited the simulation, you’ll have been briefed at different levels on why you’re here. For the sake of the newcomers, I may repeat a few details.

“Six months ago, the thirty of you were chosen as the final candidates for our military selection program. Upon application, you each agreed to enter the simulation after having your memories wiped and new ones implanted. Through running the simulation, we would test your compatability for certain roles within our forces. Take Candidate one, Eren Jaeger,”

Eren’s eyes widen. “We inserted your past - including your friendship with Alert and Miss Ackerman, and the death of your mother - into your mind. Your simulation only began with the second infiltration of the walls.”

Eren’s mouth falls open. Mikasa winds her arm around his shoulders.

Hange’s voice pipes over the sudden whispers. “If I may, Doctor, I’d like to know if we succeeded? Did we complete the simulation?”

Levi shakes his head. The guard digs a knee into his back. Does Hange really believe a word from this lunatic’s mouth?

“No group has ever beaten the simulation, and you were not the first. However, this does not mean none of you succeeded in compatibility. There are many promising candidates among you.”

“Quit the crazy bullshit, you bastard,” Levi spits. “Why don’t you explain where the fuck we are?”

“Mr. Ackerman,” the woman taps closer. “Your persistent hostility whilst the others have calmed down proves why you failed. You are unable to separate the simulation from reality, where you are kneeling right now.”

“Hostility?” Levi sways. “I was dying just five minutes ago.” His guts still burn where they’d spilled from his body.

“Not only that,” she stops before the blood splatters, glaring down at the mess. “But dying in the final battle was not your only failure. Upon having to choose between reviving Alert or Smith, you let personal feelings influence your decision. Your inability to ignore romantic and sexual attractions towards Mr. Smith-“

“That’s not-“

“Destroys your potential as a candidate. If you don’t settle down, you’ll be taken to solitary confinement.”

Levi shuts his eyes and counts to ten. The scalpel’s two metres out of reach. The guards’ hands blister his wrists. Erwin’s trying to catch his eye.

“Fuck you.”

“Calmed down now?” The doctor checks his watch. “We’ll allow you time to catch up before we assess your vitals.” The party files out, and the doors slam shut. They click with a lock.

Levi grabs at the floor and drags himself backwards. His shoulders hit the wall. He takes a deep breath.

The room disperses into rising chatter. Only Eren and his friends, and the veterans gathered around Hange’s cot, stare silently at Levi.

Erwin’s feet hit the floor as he stands up. Gazes whirl as he strides through the aisle of cots, emerging at the front of the room. Levi raises his head.

Erwin falls to one knee, three metres away. Levi pushes at the floor, but he can’t retreat any further.

Erwin presses his palms to the floor. “Levi.”

He shakes his head, drawing up his knees. 

“Levi. Hello.”

Erwin dying on the rooftop. Erwin saying goodbye. Erwin chasing him through the underground.

“Was any of it real?” His breath breaks in three. “All those fucking years. Did they implant that into my fucking mind?”

Shoulders slumping, Erwin hangs his head. “The expedition before Trost. They told me that’s when our simulation began.”

His feet sink through the floor. The oxygen’s getting thin.

“I’m sorry, Levi. I know. It felt so real.” Erwin reaches out a hand. It’s so close. It’s too far. The ground swallows him whole.

Erwin crawls forward. Levi meets him halfway. He flails out his hand and Erwin catches it, dragging him closer until Levi’s off the the floor, cradled in his lap.

He stretches his legs around Erwin’s hips until they’re even closer, chest to chest, hearts pounding in time ; there’s no inch left untouched. Erwin wraps him in his arms and buries his nose into Levi’s neck. 

“It doesn’t matter,” Erwin says. “I remember everything. That’s enough.”

Levi buries his hands in his shirt, his hair, the skin on his back. He inhales his scent: clean, fresh, medicinal. It’s not the same.

But his eyes are still cobalt, and his hair still shines the same gold. Erwin is solid beneath his fingers. Erwin is alive.

“How long ... have you been awake?”

“One month,” Erwin says. “I did everything I could, but they wouldn’t let you out. How long was it for you?”

Levi bites his lip. “Five years, Erwin. I was waiting five fucking years.”

Erwin pulls back. His long fingers frame Levi’s chin, brows climbing up his forehead. “All that time ...”

“Maybe I’m finally dead.”

“No,” Erwin presses their foreheads together. He’s burning hot. “I’m real, Levi. Believe me. I’m real.”

Ducking his head, he hides in Erwin’s chest. “I’m never letting you out of my sight again, real or not real. Bastard.”

Erwin tucks his chin atop Levi’s hair, chuckles rumbling to the core. “I wouldn’t expect anything less.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to all the lovely comments, I decided to continue :)) I’ll have to upload in short chapters if I ever want to finish, so please bear with me

The room hones back into focus as Mike approaches. Levi shifts. Erwin helps pull him to his feet.

“Hey, captain.” Mike pauses, flicking his gaze to Erwin. Erwin doesn’t move.

He lunges foward and wraps Levi in a tight embrace. Patting his shoulder twice, he eventually relents his harsh grip and steps back. “You didn’t fail. You were the strongest of us all.”

Levi flexes his fingers. Tacky warmth still clings to his skin, but there’s not a spot of red in sight. He looks past Mike’s shoulder and nods.

A bed creaks to the left. Hange stands, shuffling on their feet. Levi sighs and opens his arms.

Hange leaps into them, crushing his ribs with a squeeze. “Deciding with your heart is the bravest thing you can do. If you’d have used your head, well,” Hange knuckles his skull. “I don’t think we’d have gotten anywhere.”

Levi pinches their ear and shakes them off. He shifts closer to Erwin.

“Mike, would you gather the other veterans?” Erwin asks. “I think we should -“

Footsteps pound down the hall. The doors fly open, hinges reverberating through the walls. 

A new doctor strides in, eyes twinkling behind his specs. He’s flanked by four bodyguards holding heavy weapons; they don’t make shotguns that big.

“I’m doctor Axel.” He tweaks his glasses. “It’s time to eat. File out in a line, please. The quicker you are, the quicker we can get to medicals.”

“Medicals?” Hange cocks their head.

“Yes, Zoë. We need to scan your brains.” Levi takes a step forward. 

Eren beats him to it, jumping to his feet. “What, you think we’ll just let you poke around in our heads? We’ve barely had five minutes to talk!”

“May I remind you that you are the ones who agreed to these conditions, and that also your personal relationships are a lie. None of you knew each other before you came here, save for the Ackerman cousins.”

Levi flicks his gaze to Mikasa. She picks at her thumbs.

“Please get into a single file line.”

No ones moves. The guards tap their guns. A few seconds later, Erwin shifts.

He heads to the front of the room and stops. Levi follows and takes post behind him. One by one one, every solider follows Erwin’s lead. 

Levi checks over each head that joins the queue, but that ratty hair isn’t anywhere in sight.

So, the bastard isn’t here. Kenny might not be real, but Levi won’t be forgetting him until the day he dies. He shakes his head and returns to watching Erwin’s back.

Two guards break off to flank the group. Another walks the length of the line, tilting his gun so that it catches the light.

“That thing even got any bullets, or are you all show?” He asks. 

“You want to find out, Ackerman? If not, then pipe down.” He continues down the line.

Erwin takes a step back - nearly stepping on his toes - and dips his head. “Remember Levi, we’re the ones who signed up to this.”

“You believe that bullshit?” He hisses back.

“I’m not sure. But they know a lot more than we do.”

“Tsk.”

The doctor motions them forward. He follows Erwin’s feet.

The white light of the corridor washes all the colour from Erwin’s hair. A distant buzzing follows the group, and one of the overhead lights flickers every few seconds.

“Here we are,” Axel says, bringing a halt to the silent procession. “One at a time, please.” His fingers twitch as he gestures to the door.

The canteen is small and spotless. Food is lined up along a counter, and to the right sit six identical tables. Erwin grabs a plate and starts selecting food. Levi’s gut flips.

There’s not an inch of his stomach craving food; he reaches for a sandwich to get closer to Erwin. “The thirty-or-so in the room - is this it?”

“They didn’t let me wander around much,” Erwin reaches for the forks next to Levi’s hand. “But from what I believe, yes.”

_At least all those people you sacrificed didn’t exist._

No; that won’t matter to Erwin. 

“So, the soldiers here were the key players in the scouts. Everyone else was what, some sort of sick test?” The line pushes foward and Erwin walks on. Levi dumps the sandwich on his plate and mumbles, “What the fuck did we agree to.”

“And why did we agree to it,” Mikasa says, shoving her tray against his. She steps closer until their shoulders brush, eyes staring straight ahead. “You’re not the type to sign up for a mind-prodding experiment. If it’s true we didn’t know each other before the simulation, then you didn’t join for _him._ ”

“And you didn’t join for your friends, either,” he says.

Mikasa grabs a potato and spins around, striding back to Armin and Eren. They claim a table alone in the corner of the room.

Levi turns around to find Erwin already settling at a table. He joins him, setting down his tray on the grey tabletop.

The room is quiet save for muffled shuffling. He swings his barefeet under the bench, watching as the soldiers fall into groups and claim chairs. Erwin’s knees barely fit under the table.

“I’m sorry, Levi.” Erwin taps a finger to his fork. “That Kenny’s not here.”

“‘S’alright.” He pulls at the fraying ends of his shirt. “The bastard was more trouble than he’s worth, anyway.”

Erwin nods. “When Jean woke up, he ran over to me.” His voice drops, tone grim. “He asked the same question over and over: ‘Where’s Marco?’”

Levi flicks his gaze to the soldier, hair messy, pushing his food around the plate.

“The worst thing is, I didn’t even remember who Marco was.” Erwin’s fingers clench around his fork. “It’s hard on everyone, to wake up and find a friend gone without a trace.”

He turns to Levi, face tight. “It’s worse than death, I think.”

Though empty of words, Levi opens his mouth. Hange drops their tray down then, and it clatters to the table. Mike, Moblit, and Nanaba follow behind.

After Hange’s seated, Nanaba steps forward. “Mind if we join you?”

Erwin shifts over his tray. “Of course.”

The table dissolves into chatter: what if’s, possibly’s, and a whole lot of _I wish_ ’s. 

The walls blur. For a moment they’re a grey sky, smoke plumes high, rising from charred remains and whittled bones. The floor falls away, and his feet dangle over a red river, warm with the choking scent of heavy copper.

Will he wake up tomorrow lying in blood and broken limbs? Levi digs his nails in his palms and roots his feet to the floor.

“Say, Levi. What do you think you were, before you came here?” Hange asks from across the table, chin perched in their palm.

“I don’t know.” Hange starts to open their mouth. “I don’t care, either,” he adds quickly.

“Maybe he really was a solider,” Nanaba says.

“I’m not so sure.” Erwin leans back, observing him. “Maybe he ran a tea shop,” he decides, a small smile tugging at his lips. Levi rolls his eyes.

“A very clean one, at that!” Hange grins.

The guards shift; a new one has entered the room. The one posted at the far wall is gone. He flicks his gaze between the clock on the wall and the guards’ movements.

“Don’t be so obvious,” Erwin mutters into his ear.

“Oh, you’d rather I muse about dream jobs?”

“If you’re going to study them, pretend to eat your food at least.”

“I won’t touch it.”

Erwin steals the sandwich from his plate and takes a bite. After a few moments he splays his fingers, nods, and returns the food.

“Doesn’t seem to be drugged. Just take a damn bite, Levi.”

He raises a brow at Erwin and crosses his arms. “You’re a reckless idiot.”

“Haven’t changed then, have I?”

Has Levi really not known him for all these years? Erwin’s as familiar as the bones in his body

A guard raises his hand, motioning to another on the opposite side of the room. She slowly weaves through the tables, heading straight for Levi’s.

Erwin swings his leg over the bench, straddling the seat. Sliding closer, he plucks up Levi’s sandwich and leans in, tilting his head. 

His breath is calm and steady. Levi’s lips tingle under the warmth. Erwin tears the sandwich in half and lifts a piece between their faces, biting into one end. 

He nudges closer, giving Levi the only option of biting into the other side. Levi takes the smallest nibble possible.

Their noses brush. He closes his eyes.

When Erwin begins chewing - hot lips drawing closer - Levi tears his eyes open. In his peripheral the guard has paused, but her eyes can’t quite manage to focus on him, and a blush tints her cheeks. Eventually she spins around and returns post by the wall.

He scowls at Erwin. Erwin steals the last bite from between his teeth.

Levi side-eyes the rest of the table. Mike’s having a staring contest with his food, Nanaba wipes her cutlery, Moblit studies the rest of the room, and Hange grins. They lean over the table, hand framing their mouth.

“Quick thinking, Erwin. Well done,” they whisper shout.

Erwin shoves the other sandwich piece into Levi’s mouth and turns around. “They’re looking for trouble, and Levi’s a walking target.” He tilts his gaze, brows narrowed. “But we can’t act until they’ve explained everything. Let’s not be rash.”

“He’s right, Levi,” Mike says. “Embarrassment isn’t going to work forever. Tone down the suspicion.”

Instead of replying, Levi chews his sandwich and studies the other tables.

“Erwin Smith,” a voice calls. The old doctor emerges from the corridor, clipboard in hand. “I’m doctor Ashley. Doctor Margaret is waiting for you. You’re up first.”

Levi grips the edge of the table.

“For what?” Erwin asks.

“It’s time for your medical.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the short chapter. Longer one coming soon :)

“No.”

Every head turns to Levi. Erwin stands and looks at Doctor Ashley. “It’s fine, Levi. I’ll be right back.”

“No.”

“You don’t have the authority to say no, Ackerman,” Ashley says, tugging at his coat collar. “Come along, Erwin.”

Levi grabs Erwin’s trousers from beneath the table, tugging once. Erwin reaches down and envelopes his fingers. He squeezes, then pulls Levi’s hand away.

Rolling his shoulders, Erwin takes a step towards the door.

Levi slams his palms to the table and jumps to his feet. He grips a fistful of Erwin’ shirt, spinning him around and dragging him down.

“Don’t be stupid. We can’t trust them.”

“It’s okay, Levi. If they wanted to harm me, they had a damn long time to do so.” He tries pulling Levi’s hand off his shirt. Levi pulls him closer.

“I don’t care. You’re not going.”

Erwin wraps a hand around Levi’s neck and yanks him forward. He trips, nose landing in the dip of Erwin’s collarbone. Soft lips brush his ear. “You’re not behind the walls anymore. Wake up.”

Pushing Levi away, he starts for the door.

He takes a breath. Once, twice. Clenches his fists, each nail scarring his skin. Then he leaps.

Erwin reels around, but Levi’s already got his hand around Ashley’s neck. Wrinkles turn white as he digs his fingers into old flesh. Hands rip at the clothes on his back. Levi grips his neck as tight as he holds his swords.

He leans in, warring against the desperate fingers. “What the fuck do you want?”

A voice shouts over the click of triggers. Ashley scowls. “You ought to calm down.”

Levi presses down on his windpipe. “Answer me.”

“We’re not the enemy, Levi,” he rasps. “Don’t do anything you’ll regret. You’re smarter than this.”

Ashley’s eyes are steady. They search Levi’s face like they’re looking for another version of him. _You’re smarter than this._ What does he know?

It doesn’t matter. Memories gone, there is no before. He digs in his nails.

Something finally gives, and he’s flying through the air. Strong hands grip his waist and throw him back down behind a wall of bodies.

Erwin lets him go, only to shove a hand against his chest. The other waves behind them, urging off the armed guards. “ _Stop it._ “

“Don’t give me orders. I won’t follow them anymore.”

“You rarely used to, either.”

Levi drops his voice and leans into Erwin’s palm. “Don’t talk to me like you know me. We are nothing.”

Erwin’s hand falls away. The scythe-like words give him the edge he needs. Diving to the left, Levi races around the crowd to find the doctor.

Pain streams down his shins as he collides with something hard, and he hurtles to the floor, knees cracking against the ground. When he rolls over to watch the spinning cieling, green eyes stare down from above.

Mikasa crouches into his vision and blocks Eren from sight. She grabs Levi’s neck in a vice-like grip and shoves his face to the floor.

“Calm down.” She presses a knee to his back, talking low into his ear. “You’re going to make this difficult on all of us. Look around, the other candidates think you’re crazy.”

“You’d do the same if it was Eren,” he spits. Her hand releases, but a moment later her knee digs even further into his spine.

Footsteps tear through the silence, and someone clears their throat.

“If I may,” Hange says. “Would you allow me to go first?”

Ashley straightens his tie and begins to speak. Hange interrupts before he can finish a word.

“If I come back fine, then Erwin’s good to go. Right, Levi?”

Levi grunts. Hange spreads their hands and turns to face the guards. “This way we can avoid all the hassle.”

“Fine.” Ashley motions for the guards to step back. “Come along then, Zoë.”

Levi reaches out to grab Hange’s heel. They hop out of reach, leaving Levi with a wink. Ashley and Hange disappear through the door.

Mikasa’s knee retreats. Another hand buries in his collar, ripping him off the floor and onto his feet. Erwin lets go when Levi doesn’t fight back.

“Let’s go sit down.” Erwin says, already returning to the table. He ignores Mike and Nanaba’s wary gazes. After a few moments, Levi stomps after him.

Eventually the room reassembles, and they fall back into silence. 

~

Hange’s ’s taking too long.

He drums his foot against the exposed floor in time with the ticking clock. 

Erwin is stone-still beside him. Levi clenches his hands between his knees but his bouncing leg still brushes Erwin’s thigh.

“Erwin, about what the doctor said ...” He looks at the ground and tightens his fists.

There’s no point lying to Erwin, and though he may already have known of his feelings, Levi should’ve been the one to tell him. He’d been robbed the opportunity the first time ; the second is plain cruel. He still feels everyone’s gazes boring into back.

Erwin slowly raises a hand, inching towards Levi’s cheek. His reflection glares back in the blue of Erwin’s eyes.

“Excuse me, Mr Smith?”

Levi spins around. A young woman with a long braid waits a metre from the table. She smiles at Levi, then turns to Erwin. 

“I’m Julia, one of the other doctors studying our candidates’ minds. Watching your progress throughout the simulation was fascinating. If you have a moment, I’d love to talk to you about some of your decisions.”

Levi shifts closer to Erwin. Julia strokes her braid. Erwin quietly sighs and pushes off the bench.

“Of course.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Something more interesting is coming. I promise. I think.

Levi gets up to follow but Erwin turns back to face him. “I won’t go far,” he says.

“But-“

“Hey, Captain.” Eren stops at his side. “Uh, Levi, I mean.”

Levi shuts his eyes, takes a deep breath, and turns to face him.

“What is it?”

“Could I talk to you for a moment?” He rubs the back of his head and glances back to check his friends are still waiting. Armin and Mikasa stand nearby. Sasha, Jean, and Connie are on the very opposite side of the room.

“Go on, Levi. I’ll talk to you later.” Erwin leaves with Julia to the corner of the canteen. Levi frowns and turns back to Eren.

“So, Levi. I’m here because ...” he scratches his ear. “Well I just wanted to ... Look, I’m sorry, okay?”

The image of Eren tearing bodies apart scars the back of his eyelids. “Well, it seems your friends have forgiven you.” He looks past Eren’s shoulder at Mikasa and Armin. “Most of them, anyway. You’re lucky.”

Eren eyes the other half of his squad from across the room. “Captain, do you think I’m really ...”

Levi shakes the blood from his hands. “Its like they said, right? It was just a simulation. How you turned out, they probably planned that from the start.”

“But Captain -“

Ashley reappears, looming over Eren and resting a wrinkly hand on his shoulder. “Remember Jaeger, he’s not your captain anymore.”

Startling, Eren whips around. Hange comes in through the door after Ashley. 

He leaves Eren and makes straight for Hange. There’s not a limb missing, nor a single mark on their skin; a shine twinkles in their eyes.

“It’s incredible! Really fantastic, Levi. The life here is years ahead of the civilisation behind the walls.”

“Eldians, Hange. We were called Eldians.”

But Hange’s eyes aren’t focused on him. “It’s even more developed than what the Marleyans had! You’ll be amazed, Erwin.”

Erwin steps foward - Julia close by his side - though he’s not the only one caught in Hange’s excitement. The soliders form a ring around Hange, intent on their dancing hands.

Ashley steps in front them and looks around the ring. “And you’ll all get a chance to witness it. Though Erwin, we’re desperate to get you in. Doctor Margrets is waiting.”

A small cough turns the crowd’s attention. The sound is so light Levi’s breaths nearly drown it out.

“How about,” Julia begins. “Levi goes with him? We could do a joint session in my room instead.”

“That goes against standard procedure. Their information from the brain studies is private to the candidate.”

“And you,” Mikasa mutters.

Julia tucks a stray hair behind her ear. “But for Levi and Erwin to share personal information isn’t too bizarre, is it, Doctor?”

Ashley scowls at Julia. Why would it not be strange? In truth, they hardly know each other.

“No,” Ashley says sternly. “I suppose it wouldn’t. Go ahead, then.”

Finally breaking the doctor’s glare, Julia heads for the door with Erwin on her heels. Levi plunges his hands into his pockets and follows after.

Soon the corridor squeezes down until there’s room for just one body. Erwin’s feet tread over a splintered tile on every other step, and mould stretches it’s fingers over the floor the deeper they go. Eventually the line halts at a bone-white door.

Julia opens it with an equally white card, and they step inside. The plaque on the door reads ‘Dr J. Michaels.’

“Erwin, please take a seat,” she says, gesturing to a padded chair. It’s long enough for Erwin’s whole body.

She stops behind a desk and starts pressing buttons on a dozen metal rectangles. They light up even brighter than the door. Hange’s right; this is far more advanced than the Marleyans.

Erwin leans back against the headrest. Levi retreats until his shoulders hit the door.

“Come over here, Levi. You can have a look at the data.”

He fiddles with a loose thread. She looks up from her devices and smiles at him. Levi waits a moment, then walks over to join her.

“These are moniters.” She gestures to the array of glowing lights. “This screen shows our recordings from when Erwin was in the simulation,” she points to a monitor with cross hatching lines and colourful graphs, then moves her finger to a blank one. “And on this one I’ll record our studies from today. Understand?”

No. What technology could lie beyond this building?

“Don’t worry,” Julia says. “Whether you’re chosen or not, you’ll go through a reintegration process. You’re memories aren’t so much gone, but rather ... dormant.”

Erwin sits up in his chair. Levi meets his gaze.

Shaking her head, Julia walks over to the chair and begins fiddling with a tangle of wires. She rests a hand on Erwin’s forehead to guide his neck back. Levi’s muscles tense.

“I’m going to attach some of these up here, okay?” She taps his temples.

“Okay.”

“Levi?” Julia asks.

“Huh?” He looks between the two. “Oh, uh. Okay.”

Nodding, her hands quickly get to work. If they were back behind the walls, he’d say Erwin looked silly. He shakes his head.

Julia rejoins him at the monitors and aggressively taps the screens. Her fast fingers are steady and practiced.

“You know, Erwin,” she says without looking up. “You really are a strong candidate.”

“Is that so?”

“Mmm.” Her finger pauses halfway to the monitor, and she finally looks up. “I think I can probably tell you, since the simulation is over and everyone has been briefed.”

Erwin’s fingers twitch like he wants to look at her, but he keeps his head still.

“Your father was a doctor here. He was brilliant. A lead designer of the simulation, in fact.”

Levi’s breath catches in his throat. Erwin’s mouth falls open. “My father?”

“Yes.” Julia sighs. “He was much like your father in the simulation. A self insert character, if you will.” Levi pictures his own mother, blue and white and decomposing in her bed. The sandwich rises in his stomach.

“Is he here?” Erwin quickly asks, fingers drumming the armrest.

“I’m sorry, Erwin. He died when a medical facility was bombed abroad.” Erwin shuts his eyes. “But his files are still here if you want to read them. I’m sure I can grant you access.”

“Yes. Please. I’d be very grateful.”

“Now, sit still so I can finish my work.” Erwin sinks back into the chair. 

When the wires finally detach from Erwin’s head, Levi makes for the door.

“Hold on, Levi.” He spins around. “You’re up next. It’s part of the deal.”

Erwin walks over to him and nods. He eyes Julia’s beckoning hands, then slowly stomps over to the chair. The wires buzz with warmth where they meet his skin. Erwin waits behind the monitors, the screen reflections shining in his eyes.

“And Levi?” Erwin asks after long, silent minutes. “Is he a strong candidate?”

Levi keeps his eyes on the cieling. The tap of Julia’s fingers hitting screens stops for a moment. 

“He’s ... a special case.” Levi grips the armrest. “Ashley is the head doctor here. Levi, you were his pride. His own creation, of sorts. I can’t tell you much more, but know that he’s harsh on you because he expects the most.”

“That doesn’t answer Erwin’s question.”

“Because I’m not sure. I study data. I don’t make the final decision.”

“That’s down to Ashley, I presume?” Erwin asks.

“Correct. Levi, you’re done.”

He rips the wires from his head and slides off the leather. Julia grimaces at the hanging wires but quickly herds them to the door.

When they step outside, a guard is waiting in the corridor. “Let’s go,” he says, taking up the rear. They follow Julia back down the corridor.

He squeezes up beside Erwin and walks on his toes. “What does this mean?”

“I’m not sure,” Erwin whispers. “But perhaps Nanaba was right. You really could have been a solider. A good one.”

His heels hit the floor, and he files back into line.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m not a fan of this chapter. I’m sorry :(

Back in the debrief room, Julia checks a crumpled piece of paper.

“Connie Springer,” she calls. “You’re the first on my list. Please follow me.”

They pass Connie as they walk through the doorway. Levi chooses a cot in the corner of the room where he can watch every solider as they file out and back in. When everyone’s returned, his shoulders finally relax.

Ashley’s arrival is unsurprising. His drooping eyes skim over Levi, sour lips frowning for a moment. Levi’s not sure what sort of ‘creation’ the doctor was after, but he doesn’t seem happy with the result.

“Over the next thirty days we will be deciding our final selection,” Ashley begins. “We’ll be studying your brain patterns every forty-eight hours until then. We recommend training in the mean time to maintain both your mental and physical fitness.”

Levi leans forward off the wall and rests his elbows on his knees. “Now that that’s over, can you tell us what we’re being chosen for?”

Ashley’s brows knit together. “Only those chosen will be privy to the purpose of our special task force.”

Murmurs dance around the room. Julia takes a step forward. “Don’t worry, everyone has a home to go back to after the thirty days. You’ll be staying in assigned dormitories until then.”

“You’ll find your workout and sleeping clothes there,” Ashley says to conclude. “For now you have access to most of the facility, providing a guard escorts you. Now, please follow me to your rooms.”

A wide corridor leads to row of steel doors. There’s no keyhole nor handle, but a black box with a slit down the middle adorns the wall outside every room. Ashley swipes a card similar to Julia’s through the first box.

“Christa, Ymir, Mikasa and Sasha. This is your room.”

Mikasa and Sasha enter first, keeping two metres between them. Ymir goes to follow, but spins around when Historia doesn’t join her.

“That’s you, dammit.” Ymir tugs on her arm. “Come on.”

Historia’s eyes widen, but she quickly gives in to the impatient hand after a small “oh.”

“Next,” Ashley says, swiping his card. Levi shakes his head and finds Ashley already halfway down the corridor. “Erwin, Mike, Jean and Levi.”

Erwin waits for him to join him by the door, and they walk in together. The door slams shut behind them. The beds rattle under the blinking lights.

The two bunks are pushed to opposite walls. They’re small, metal, and wiry; he squints at Mike and Erwin’s bulking bodies.

“We could uh, push the bunks together if you want.” Jean offers, scratching the back of his head.

Mike throws him a questioning glance, but then his eyes soften as they land on Erwin and Levi. “Oh, yeah.” He strokes his chin. “As long as Jean keeps to his side of the bed.”

Levi tilts back his head to watch the lights flicker. Erwin’s eyes burn the back of his head. After a few seconds, Erwin says, “there’s no need.”

Levi spares Erwin a glance in the corner of his eye. 

“Do you have a preference, Levi? I think I’m too tall for the top bunk.”

“I’m taking the bottom,” he says, striding across the room and sinking into the mattress. The door is in perfect view, and any visitor will have to tackle the ladder to reach Erwin.

“Alright, then.” Erwin sighs. Mike moves to his side and pats his shoulder.

“Looks like we’re in for an uncomfortable thirty days.”

~

Pounding fists and heavy feet echo around the training room walls. A row of punching bags swing from chains as both candidates and body guards alike practice their hooks. Levi scrunches his nose at the sour waft of sweat.

Rolls of tape sit on a table besides the water fountain. He takes one to wrap his knuckles, then selects a free punching bag.

As soon as his knuckles meet leather, a thrill runs down his spine. But after three rounds, the joy wears off. He looks around at the other soldiers, then settles on Erwin and Mike’s sparring match at the centre of the room. Mike catches his gaze.

“Oi, Levi. You want a round with Erwin? I need a break.”

“And I don’t?” Erwin wipes the sweat off his forehead with the back of his wrist.

“Hey, I’m older than you.” Mike furrows his brows. “I think.”

Levi steps onto the mats and shakes out his hands. “Alright. Erwin?”

Erwin smiles and rolls his shoulders. “Step on up.”

Levi keeps a fair distance between them, and they begin to circle each other, step by step. The way Erwin threw him off the doctor and tossed him aside flicks through his mind. He narrows his gaze and charges.

Erwin doesn’t move. He spreads his feet, elbows up, palms out like he’s welcoming Levi into his arms. Just as he’s about to feignt left, Erwin grabs his wrists and pulls him into the air.

Levi flips over Erwin’s head, but his back is heading straight for the floor. He tucks in his knees and sinks into the mat on his toes.

In an Instant, he springs off his feet, rips his hands from Erwin’s grasp, and hooks onto his shoulders. He squeezes his legs around Erwin’s neck and arches back, sending them hurtling to the floor.

At the last second, Erwin twists. Levi shoots out his hands to stop his head smashing against the floor. He rolls over to find Erwin already in his face.

A huge hand grips his elbow, and the other takes hold of his waist. Erwin pins him on his back and frames Levi’s thighs with his own.

Levi bucks off the mat, but Erwin’s hand keeps his hips on the floor. The heat of his fingers flushes though Levi’s skin where they stretch under his shirt. 

Levi scowls, and brings up a knee between Erwin’s legs.

For a moment the crushing grip relaxes, and he shoves with all his weight. Levi presses his hands to Erwin’s shoulders and forces his back to the mat. He digs a knee into his stomach and places an elbow across his throat.

Leaning in, soft blonde hair tickles his forehead. His vision blurs back into focus, and Erwin’s smiling up at him.

“Bastard,” Levi says, gabbing Erwin’s chin and pushing it up so he can’t see the grin. “You could at least try.”

“I did for the first half. But it looked like you needed to blow off some steam.”

“Be grateful I don’t have my blades.”

“Of course,” Erwin says, and taps Levi’s arm. He releases the pressure from Erwin’s throat and helps him off the floor.

A presence looms behind his shoulder. The shadow is heavy, tall and commanding. Levi spins around and comes face to face with a solid wall.

The guard’s even taller than Erwin. Huge muscles ripple down to his forearms, and his knuckles are stained purple and blue.

“Ackerman, wanna spar with me?”

Levi looks the brute up and down, then flexes his fingers. The guard’s buddies have formed a ring around the mat, their interest catching the attention of the candidates; Levi can’t back down now. 

Erwin’s trying to catch his gaze, but he focuses on the guard. This is his chance to prove they can’t keep kicking him around.

“Sure,” he says. “Weapons allowed?”

The guard smiles. “I’d prefer to use my fists.”

“Fine.”

He’ll have to be fast; if one of those fists connects with his head, it’ll shatter his skull. He walks into position and takes a ready stance.

The guard moves first. He charges Levi, fists up, gaze set. Levi ducks and grabs his ankle, dragging it with him as he slides under the man’s legs. But he doesn’t go down.

Levi jumps up and and kicks out his foot. It nearly connects with the guard’s knee, but the man spins just in time. Iron fingers clasp around Levi’s ankle and yank him into the air.

He twists, but there’s no escape. There’s just enough time to shoot out his hands before he collides with the rock-hard mat.

Jarring pain claws down his forearms and snaps the tension in his elbows. He collapses to the floor, cheekbone nearly tearing through his skin. A horrible wailing rings in his ears.

Dragging himself around, a boot flies into his vision. He rolls to the right and the foot lands on his hair, rippling a dozen strands from his head. The boot stomps to his left next, nearly crushing his ear.

Levi jumps up in a second. His vision spins so wildly, the ground might be shaking.

“Stop dodging,” the guard says. “You ever gonna throw a punch?”

Jeers call out behind him. He takes a step foward, but the ground moves a foot out of reach and he almost crumples to the mat. Levi holds his skull and glares at the guard.

The man’s rippling form merges into something larger. Levi blinks; a titan emerges before him. The cieling falls away to skies of hazy red. Copper burns his throat, and the ground is sticky with something warm.

The blades are heavy and familiar in his palms. He flicks his wrists so the tips point backwards.

The titan stretches out it’s gruesome hand, it’s fingers dripping blood and bits of brain under its nails. Levi narrows his eyes. Then he charges.

The metres dwindle until he’s thick in the foul stench of flesh. The titan’s arm careens right. Levi dives under it and twirls around, bringing his blades up high behind his shoulder. He squeezes his eyes shut and drives down. 

A huge crack smashes through the ringing in his ears. The snap reverberates all the way to his shuddering spine. Opening his eyes, the light of the training room filters back into vision.

Levi’s fist is buried in the wall. The splinters stretch all the way to the corners of the room. Plaster and dust litters his shoes.

As he drags out his hand - buried halfway to the elbow - he flexes his fingers. Not a bone is broken. Impossible: this wall, it’s solid brick and steel. 

Spinning around, he’s faced with everyone’s eyes staring right at him.

He closes his fists to hide his insistent trembling. The dumbfounded expressions of the candidates provide no answers; he instead turns to the guards.

“Training’s over for today,” the guard he was sparring with says without taking his eyes off Levi. He gestures to the door behind his back. 

“Go on, everyone. Time’s up.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter you’ll have to accept that Mike, Jean, and Erwin are very, very heavy sleepers.

His skin blooms pink under the water. The grazes crosshatching his knuckles burn and itch, but no blood joins the stream. Levi stares at his hand that should be shattered in pieces, and thinks of the wall that shouldn’t have so much as dented.

Upturning his palm, he flexes his fingers. The muscles move like ordinary flesh and blood. Where had that strength come from?

“The water cuts off in five! Are you okay, Levi?” Erwin calls from the changing room.

“Fine.” He sinks back against the shower wall. The tiles are damp and cool. “Go on without me.”

His voice barely rises above the crashing water. It blocks out Erwin’s response as he slides to the floor.

Suddenly, ice freezes his skin. His eyes fly open as he jumps upright. The setting of the shower has been switched to cold.

Levi crawls off the floor and slams the water off. Yanking open the door, he returns to the changing room and searches for his slacks. The room is silent and empty, save for the pattering of water in the shower stalls. He pulls on his clothes quickly, finds the guard waiting outside, and takes the lead back to the dorms.

Inside is dim. The overhead lights are off, but beside Erwin’s bed is a small lamp sitting on the floor, illuminating the room in soft yellow light and a constant buzz.

“Where’d you get that thing?”

“Hm?” Erwin rolls over from his spot on Levi’s bed. “Ah, Julia lent me that. Great, isn’t it? You don’t even have to light it.”

Levi hums and narrows his eyes on the papers clasped in Erwin’s hand. “And those?”

“My father’s files.” He smiles, eyes glinting in the lamp’s reflection. “I haven’t found anything about his personal life, but the documents about his research are fascinating.”

Levi walks past the other bunk on the way to Erwin. Jean shifts in his sleep, but Mike’s not in the room.

Is it that late already? He’s yet to see a window in the whole facility; they could tell him day was night and he wouldn’t believe otherwise.

“Could I have a look?”

“Oh,” Erwin shifts the papers closer to his chest. “Perhaps once I’ve finished. Is that alright?”

Erwin’s life is here, outside. Levi’s is stuck in candlelit dinners and borrowed jackets that were too long at the sleeves.

“Uhh, yeah.” He sits down on the floor and leans back against the bed frame, pulling one knee up and draping his arm across it. “Of course.”

The hours pass to the sound of Erwin shuffling through papers behind him. When the shuffling finally stops, Levi opens his eyes.

Turning around, he finds Erwin passed out on his covers, papers lifting off his face with every breath. Levi drags himself off the floor and carefully removes the papers, prying the last few from between his fingers. He arranges them in a neat pile and tucks them under the bed.

The ladder squeaks as he climbs up, so he pulls off Erwin’s own bed covers as quickly as possible and hops back down, draping them over his body.

The steel door groans as it slides open. Levi spins around as Mike strolls in. He yawns into his hand before collapsing onto his bed.

Levi purses his lips and returns to his spot at the end of the bunk. His eyes slowly drift closed to Mike’s snores.

A tinny rattling rips him from his dream. His palms are sweaty and slip all over the smooth floor as he tries to push himself up.

The lamp has gone out; he can’t even see his own feet. Creaks and scratches moan from somewhere in the room. He stands and cranes his head around, but the sound bounces around the walls and he can’t find the source.

In an instant, something grabs him by the back of the neck. Another hand covers his mouth in a suffocating grip. Every muscle in Levi’s body freezes to the core. 

“Calm down.”

Levi digs his nails into the hands and rips them away. He whips around and shoves the body into the wall.

“What the fuck, Mikasa,” he hisses, leaning close to her ear.

“Get off me.” She grabs hold of his wrists.

“Not until you fucking explain.”

“Get off and I will,” she spits. He waits a moment, finally spotting a glare of silver in the dark, then pushes off her shoulders and takes a step back.

He hears a shuffling, before cold fingers coil back around his wrist. She pulls him in an unknown direction and then drags him to the floor.

He shoots out his free hand quickly enough to break the impact on his knees. “Wh-“

“Shh. Just feel.” She pulls his hand forward until his fingers brush something smooth and cold. Then she lets go, and he traces the shape for himself. He skims over sharp edges, rungs, and thin gaps.

“The vent,” he concludes. “What about it?”

She presses an object into his hand. It’s pointed and warm.

“I grabbed this scalpel off the floor when you threw a fit after waking up,” she whispers. “I unscrewed the bolts of the vent in my room with it.”

“The vents link?” He whips his gaze back to her hazy figure.

“The dorms do, at least. And the training room.” She doesn’t try to take the scalpel back. Levi turns it in his palm before slipping it into his pocket.

“Why are you here?”

Her silhouette shifts, and her clothes brush the wall. Levi leans back against the concrete beside her. He watches the direction in which Erwin’s soft breathing filters through the room.

After a long moment, Mikasa replies, though it’s not much of an answer. “You know, they don’t lock the training room.”

He opens his mouth.

“Levi,” she continues. “When I pinned you down in the cafeteria, I felt something in the back of your neck.”

“Huh?” Suddenly, a finger digs into his nape. His skin stretches over something angular. He hisses.

“I don’t know what it is.” She pulls her hand away. “But I checked everyone in their sleep, and only four of us have it.”

“Who?”

“You, me, Armin and Eren. Armin’s is the freshest, though Eren’s scarring is still visible.” Her breath catches. “I haven’t checked Erwin yet. Did you notice one?”

“No,” he whispers. “But I’ll find a way to check. What do the others think about it?”

Mikasa sighs. “I haven’t said anything.”

“Why?”

“Eren’s eyes are open during the day, but he doesn’t really see. I think he’s still back there.” She takes a deep breath and continues. “And Armin, he’s just as obsessed with this place as Hange.”

“And you?”

“It’s like this is a dream, and I’m still waiting to wake up.” She presses her palm to the bare concrete. “Another day behind the walls.”

Erwin stirs in his sleep. Mikasa stands and heads back to the vent.

“Levi.” She picks the grate off the floor with a clank. “He won’t listen.”

Levi looks back to his bed, searching out Erwin’s form in the dark.

“I know.”


	7. Chapter 7

The training room the next day is charged with a taught energy, like a match slowly rolling towards a puddle of liquor. Levi catches Erwin’s gaze every time he ducks under one of Mike’s swings on the other side of the room.

“Pay attention,” Mikasa snipes, catching his elbow and flinging him to the mat. “The captain would never have been so easily defeated.”

“It’s not like I have the titans to motivate me now,” he grunts.

“So you’re not trying to test your strength?” She twists Levi’s hand in her grip to eye his grazed knuckles.

“No. I don’t fancy carving another hole in the wall.” He swings out a leg to uplift her feet. “Besides, I don’t think _they_ want me to to either.”

Mikasa catches herself on her palms and follows his gaze. Half the guards are pretending to train and twice the amount as yesterday are posted by the door. She shifts her gaze to the hurriedly covered wall and taps the nape of Levi’s neck.

“Have you talked to him yet?” She asks quietly.

“No.”

“But it might be mentioned in his father’s files.”

He pushes off the mat and stands up. “I’m going to shower.”

“Levi,” she says to his retreating back.

“Go fetch your dog,” he jerks his head towards Eren, whose hands are frozen midway to the punching bag whilst his eyes stare blankly at the wall. “He looks lost.”

~

Four of the showers are already full. Water spatters the floor by each pair of heels and steam plumes from the tops of the stalls, catching the dull light in small flecks. Levi pads over the damp floor to the final stall.

The water scolds like a candle flame, drawing a groan from his overworked lungs. His shoulders slacken and his head tips back, rivulets cleansing the salt from his skin.

His fingers find the nape of his neck. The bump barely pushes at his skin: an implant of sorts. Does it have something to do with his burst of inhuman strength? Julia’s words echo around his mind: _Levi, you were his pride. His special creation, of sorts._

Maybe the Ackerman power part of the simulation wasn’t so fantastical after all. And Mikasa, she has the implant too. But what of Eren and Armin?

Doors slam further down the row as soliders finish their showers. In the new quiet, only the downpour of one other remains.

“You had a hard time against Mikasa today,” Erwin’s low voice rumbles from the stall adjacent.

“How’d you know it was me?” Levi vigorously scrubs soap into his skin.

“Because I can’t see your head over the stall.”

Levi wraps his knuckles against the divider on the way to the shampoo. Erwin only chuckles and grows quiet.

“Mike was giving you a hard time, too.”

“Mm. It feels as though a titan is pulling my muscles apart.” His defeated sigh cuts through the water. “I could really do with a massage.”

Levi hums agreement and starts scrubbing shampoo into his hair. He thinks of the evening ahead: watching Erwin read through his father’s files and counting down the hours until the thirty days are over.

“So,” he begins casually, “you have any guesses to who’ll be chosen?”

“I can’t say I haven’t thought about it, but I have no idea, since we still don’t know what they’re testing us on. What about you?”

“Well, I’m sure I know one.” A few strands of hair fall out in his fingers. “You seem like a real favourite.”

“Levi,” Erwin says, cutting off the water.

“I mean, you were everyone’s favourite commander, right? You’re the first choice. But me? I’ve got no chance.”

“Levi.” His fingers still their scrubbing. “Whether you or I are chosen, we’ll see each other after the thirty days. I won’t just disappear.”

Levi shakes his head. “Don’t you get it? This is why we signed up to this. When you get chosen, you’re gone. The military isn’t a place to make buddies.”

“Slow down, Levi. We don’t even know what we’re being chosen for yet.”

“Quit it.” Shampoo floods Levi’s eyes, setting them alight. “You’ve always been an idealistic bastard, haven’t you? Just give me a break for one damn second.”

Erwin falls silent. Levi drains his hair with burning water and turns to leave.

His stall door swings open. Erwin stands in the entrance, utterly naked, crystalline water rolling off his body and eyebrows set in smouldering anger.

Levi nearly falls back. He presses a hand to the slippery wall to steady himself. Erwin doesn’t move, just tips his chin upwards, yet still managing to look down on Levi.

He draws his brows together and searches Erwin’s gaze. Blue eyes opaque and hair turning the light gold, his expression never breaks.

Levi charges forward and grabs him. Erwin’s body is smooth and wet; there’s nothing to hold on to. He clutches his hands around Erwin’s neck and drags him under the water, finding grip in his hair.

Stretching onto his toes, he yanks Erwin’s head down and presses their lips together. He’s burning hot and hard and heavy. It’s painful, and it’s searing. Levi digs in his nails and presses them closer.

Feet slipping, Erwin pushes him against the chilling wall. He shoves a knee between Levi’s thighs to keep him high enough so their lips don’t break apart. Levi slips down, and Erwin’s leg grinds against him.

Groaning, he squirms against the wall. Erwin grips his hip with a hot hand to pin his body. He takes hold of Levi’s opposite leg, lifting it and wrapping it around his own thigh. The movement causes his knee to grind against Levi again.

Levi twists his head and presses his cheek to the wall, breaking the kiss. Each one of his desperate pants breaks in two.

Fingers coil around Levi’s chin and drag his face back into view. Erwin attacks his neck with teeth and a scolding tongue. Levi throws his head back, loosing sight of Erwin’s free hand.

Then warmth trails down the arch of his back, at once featherlight and crushingly heavy. The touch follows the dip down to his ass, tracing the line, then chases Levi’s shivers to the soft skin between his thighs.

Erwin kneeds his thumb into the tender skin. He drags further up with every roll of his knuckle. As Erwin captures his lips again, he takes Levi in his hand.

Firm muscle and heat and old callouses; Erwin’s hand is huge. Levi jerks, but his whole body is trapped. Erwin’s hand begins moving up and down, slower than the water drifting down the drain. Levi scratches his nails over Erwin’s back as deep moans claw up his throat. In return, Erwin bites down on his lip.

His strokes speed up, matching the pulses shuddering through Levi’s body. Thick heat floods his gut and threatens to catch fire.

But then Erwin’s hand stills.

Erwin brings his other hand between them and presses a forefinger to Levi’s lips. He leans back, intensely watching Levi’s flushed scowl.

“Decide.” Erwin’s voice is hard and scratched. “Do you know me, or do you not?”

Levi stares at Erwin through the water pooling off his lashes. Where the fuck did that question come from?

Then he recalls the fight in the canteen, and his own hot fury. _Don’t talk to me like you know me. We are nothing,_ he’d told Erwin.

But he can’t give Erwin the answer his steady gaze is searching for. “I don’t know.” Levi tightens his grip. “But I want to learn you. All of you.”

Erwin captures his lips once more and squeezes Levi between his fingers. He tugs just once, and Levi cries out.

Erwin leans back and gives him room to breath. He strokes Levi down through his high, then holds his hand under the water to clean it. Levi slides his fingers to the nape of Erwin’s neck and gently presses down.

There’s no small raise, nor any line of surgical scarring. Should he tell Erwin about his own implant?

But something about the way Erwin clutched his father’s files to his heart keeps his lips pressed together.

Slowly, the blood returns to his legs. He slides down the wall and kneels before Erwin. Erwin raises a brow, but Levi just scowls and grabs hold of his hips.

All of a sudden, the water turns to ice. Levi jerks so hard his back hits the wall with a crack. Erwin pulls Levi up and shakes his head.

“Water’s off,” Erwin says.

“So it seems,” Levi grumbles. He knits his brows together. “But what about you?”

Erwin smiles. “I think the water will take care of that.”

Levi must not look convinced because Erwin continues. “Twenty nine days left, remember,” he says, smoothing down Levi’s hair.

Levi relishes in the touch for a few moments longer before flicking Erwin’s careful fingers away. He leads the way into the corridor.

Levi reaches the changing room before noticing the absence of persuit. Spinning around, he finds Erwin smiling from the stall’s entrance.

“What is it?”

Erwin shakes his head, sending droplets flying. “They really never could have faked you.”

“What are you waffling about, old man?” Levi turns to get changed. “Come on.”


	8. Chapter 8

Erwin’s back on his bed, head buried nose deep in papers. If it wasn’t for his leg slung carelessly over the other, he might be doing work.

Levi leans against the frame of the bunk and stares at the buzzing lamp. His fingers itch to smash it, but the droning fills the silence. Tingles still make his thighs fuzzy and the heat won’t flee his cheeks.

He shifts to watch Erwin’s long, deft fingers as they flip through pages, muscles rippling from his wrist all the way to his short-sleeve shirt. Erwin rarely showed so much skin behind the walls. Now, he flaunts it naturally.

“Stop it,” Levi says.

“Sorry?” Erwin finally looks up from the files and frowns.

“Stop that. You’re not commander anymore.” Seeing Erwin with papers; it’s like he’s waiting for Levi to stroll into his office - never knocking - and dropping the casualty reports on his desk.

_You performed well today, Levi._

_Tell that to the soldiers._

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Erwin shifts his gaze back to his current page.

Levi pushes to his feet and strides over to Erwin. He grabs the papers between his fingers and rips them from Erwin’s grasp.

“Hey,” Erwin protests.

Levi shoves the files onto the top bunk and crosses his arms. “You’re obsessed.”

Erwin pushes off the pillow and sits upright. “Excuse me?”

“You’re losing perspective.”

“I am? Everyone’s calmed down now, Levi. You should to.”

“Are you serious?” Levi’s fingers squeeze tighter around his arms.

“Stop checking behind your back,” Erwin commands. As soon as Levi scoffs in response, Erwin shoots out a hand and grabs his knee. He yanks forward, forcing Levi to step between his legs.

“What’s up with you, Levi?” Then his eyes drift down, and his hand shifts. He shoves it under Levi’s waistband.

Levi’s arms jerks apart and he stares wide-eyed down at Erwin.

“Ah, I see,” Erwin says. “Still frustrated, are you?”

Levi digs his nails into palms. “S- Stop it.”

Erwin raises a brow. “Why?”

“I hate you.”

“I’ve wanted to do this to you for so long. Did you know that, Levi?” Erwin’s voice is earnest. “The doctor was wrong, I never managed to ignore my feelings. I made some damn risky decisions because of you.”

Levi shoots out his hand and wraps it around Erwin’s neck. He shoves him down onto the bed and crawls on top, framing Erwin’s hips with his knees.

“I hate you.” Leaning down, Levi digs his fingers into Erwin’s hair and presses their lips together.

Erwin shoves a hand up his shirt and drags him down. “You’re an idiot,” Levi rasps between breaths.

“You know it.” Their tongues brush together, and Levi yanks at blond strands. 

The click of the door jumpstarts their heartbeats. Footsteps stop abruptly in the entrance.

“Well, hello” Mike says. He quickly wipes the shock from his face and places a hand over his eyes. Rose tints the tops of his ears. “I do hate to interrupt, but I’d really like to get to bed.”

Levi collapses onto Erwin and presses his face to his chest. Erwin wraps his hands around Levi’s back.

“Of course, Mike. I’ll switch the light out for you.” There’s a smile in Erwin’s voice.

“Oh, I’m sure you will. Though just to warn you, Jean should be coming back soon.”

Sighing, Levi rolls off Erwin and crawls up to the top bunk. He doesn’t remember relinquishing his dibs on the bottom bunk, but Erwin’s already settling down.

He gathers the papers and reads the title page: _Dr M. Smith._

“Levi,” Erwin says quietly, coiling warm fingers around Levi’s ankle on the ladder. “You can stay with me tonight, if you’d like.”

Levi hastily straightens the papers and slides them under his pillow. “It’s okay.”

“But I don’t -“

“Goodnight, Erwin.” Levi tugs his ankle from his grip and climbs onto the covers. He stares at the ceiling and waits for Erwin to shuffle into bed. A few moments later, Jean returns, and the light flicks out.

The problem is, Erwin’s only half right. He’s not the only one tugging Levi like a taught wire; one more day in this place, and he might just snap.

He slips the scalpel from his pocket and twirls it in his fingers. Erwin thinks he can kiss the concern from Levi’s lips, idealistic bastard.

He waits until everyone’s breathing has evened and slowed until crawling back down the ladder. Stopping at Erwin’s side, Levi watches his fluttering lashes. _I’ll be back soon,_ he could say. _I can’t just lie here in ignorance. You used to believe that, Erwin._

But Mikasa’s words ring through his mind, _”he won’t listen.”_ Levi clenches the scalpel until sticky warmth floods his palm. Guided by his hand on the wall, he creeps over to the vent.

He crouches on his knees and blindly feels for the screws. The scalpel barely fits in the bolt’s ridge and it slips with each flick of his wrist. He winces at every scrape of metal, but eventually the bolt rattles to the floor.

After all four are removed, he takes the grate from the wall and carefully places it beside his knees. Even for him, this will be a squeeze.

He climbs into the metal prison headfirst. His back drags against the vent’s roof as his hands pull him onward, but the metal is smooth and slippery. All’s fine until he reaches a crossroad.

The facility is a labyrinth. Fortunately, Levi’s passed the training room enough times. He takes his chance with the right turning and stops at a grate.

Through the gaps in the metal, the training room floor reflects a glowing blue light. He tests the grate and finds it unbolted. Levi sends thanks to Mikasa and drops through the gap.

His knees buckle under the impact. Tucking in his limbs, he rolls over the floor until a pile of mats breaks his speed. He stays still in the silence and listens for any movement. Satisfied, he climbs onto his feet and heads for the door.

As promised, the door is unlocked. He steps into the corridor and quickly ducks into the shadows. Constantly eyeing the blinking cameras, he keeps one shoulder pressed to the cold wall and starts down the corridor.

Overhead, the darkened lights flicker in a jagged rhythm. Water from the nearby showers echoes with broken drips. He turns into corridor after identical corridor in search of the offices.

Eventually he reaches a hall of glass rooms. Each has a half wall, with huge windows sat atop that stretch to the cieling and all around the rooms. The panel on the first door reads ‘Doctor S. Ashley.’

Then there’s a murmur. A soft pair of footsteps bounce down the corridor as two voices chase the sound.

Levi throws himself behind the first office and drops to his knees. His skin cracks over the caps. The voices grow louder and clearer and closer until suddenly they stop, two metres from Levi. He sucks in a final a breath.

And the footsteps pick up again, turning in the opposite direction. Levi presses his palms to the floor and fills his lungs.

Retreating from behind the the wall, he pads back over to the door. But when he goes to test the handle, his hand pauses in mid air; the door is already open ajar. Levi checks both ways down the corridor before slipping inside.

He could have an hour until the doctor returns. He could have thirty seconds.

The carpet is rough against his bare feet. He bypasses the desk full of screens and heads straight for the shelves, tucked under the panels of glass. He gets to his knees and tears his eyes over the grouped files.

There’s hundreds of them, all neatly organised yet completely foreign. He raises a shaking hand to the first shelf that catches his attention: ‘Mission 10.’

Below the title sits two dozen folders, each labelled with a name - all immediately recognisable. These are his soldiers.

Running a hand along the files, he searches for his name. It’s not in L, so he tries A next.

But it’s not there either. Armin Alert, Mikasa Ackerman. No Levi in sight. Knees trembling, he searches for Erwin’s name instead.

He finds it immediately. But right next to it, sitting on its right, is his own name.

The file reads, ‘Levi Smith’.


	9. Chapter 9

He rips the file from the shelf and throws open the cover. His fingers can’t catch the edges of the pages, so he grabs the paper in fistfuls and tears his eyes over the crumpled words.

_Ackerman; active member for ten years._

Lies.

_Recommended for Special Ops Squad under guidance of Captain Smith._

Lies.

_First test subject for superhuman trials: Success._

Lies.

_Put into simulation after Special Ops Squad’s tenth mission failure, along with the other twenty-nine squad members._

Lies.

When he flips the next page, his shaking fingers stop cold. A photo slips from the file, coming loose from a paper clip attached to the page. Not a part of the file; someone put it there.

Levi reaches for the photo, but his hand moves like its carved from lead. He grips the image and brings it into the faded light.

Erwin glows in an ivory suit, his hand offered to Levi in dark attire, smiling with his eyes and more. Levi has a smile of his own and his cheeks are a mortifying pink. Behind them sits an alter of sorts, and huge stain glass windows climb high out of shot. Every head in the foreground is bathed in kaleidoscopic light as they watch he and Erwin in the heart of the church.

He closes his fingers around the photo and searches the page it came from.

_In cooperation to become the first subject in the superhuman trials, L. Ackerman was granted permission for marital union with E. Smith._

Then, newly scribbled underneath: _Possible effect in simulation. Will they remember?_

Levi braces his hands to the floor and dry heaves into the corner. His lungs constrict like there’s a rope around his windpipe.

Then a deafening siren wails through the facility. Heavy slams follow, drumming louder with every thud; the doors are closing.

Shoving the photo into his pocket, he reaches across the floor and throws a chair leg between the door and frame. The door tries to close, but the chair holds tight. Footsteps slam down the corridor and Levi snaps back around, crawling beneath the desk. His head cracks against the tabletop.

Two people stop outside, their silhouettes blinking through the window under blue flashing lights. Their voices are whispers amid the siren.

“-someone on cameras-“

“-ask who’s missing from the dorms.”

“No, it’ll raise suspicion -“

“- tell them it’s a drill. Line the patients up outside.”

“We’ll see who’s missing.”

Levi twists his neck to see the doctor’s white coats whirl as they retreat down the corridor. He crams the file back on the shelf; the photo is locked in his pocket.

He shuffles out the door and sprints through the corridor. His sweat-slick feet makes him stumble over every step. Each time a shadow dances down the corridor, Levi throws himself behind a wall. When he makes it to the training room, he doesn’t hesitate to run inside.

He grabs the stacked mats and drags them across the floor. His nails crack under the strain, but he manages to pull them beneath the vent. Climbing up, he hauls his body back inside the metal. The siren drops like there’s cotton in his ears and blue still flashes in aftershocks over his vision.

Skin burning where his shirt rides up, he clambers back through the suffocating vent, the clicking of guns and stamping of feet chasing him from below.

The vent eventually slips downwards. Pushing off, he slides all the way down, ignoring the bite of friction. His head pops out first into the light of the room.

A hard grip seizes the neck of his shirt. It yanks upwards, and the hem cuts into Levi’s throat. Choking, he tears his hands over the front of his shirt to pull in down.

But before he can grip hold of any fabric, he’s dragged from the vent and thrown onto the floor. He doesn’t even make it to his feet when another pair of hands hook under his arms and pull him upright. His back hits an iron chest.

In front of him, Jean stands furiously by the vent. Levi tries to twist in the current grip, but he can’t shift an inch. The siren shuts off.

“What do we do with him?” Mike asks from above his head.

Jean scowls and flexes his fist. “I don’t know.” He shakes his head. “I don’t - he’s fucking crazy. Think the doctors have anything to put him to sleep?”

It’s like he’s not even there. He brings his heel down on the bones in Mike’s foot and manages to tear free of his grasp. Mike goes for him again, but Levi jumps back until his back hits the steel bunk. He throws a hand out in front of him.

“Erwin?” Mike asks.

Levi follows his gaze. Erwin stands frozen by the opposing bunk. He’s looking at Levi, but there’s nothing reflected in his eyes. 

“Leave him.”

The photograph smoulders in his pocket. Who was Levi Smith, and why would he choose to forget his husband? Did he even enter the simulation willingly?

There wasn’t a drop of information on the ‘military selection scheme.’ Besides, it seems they all joined the military a _long_ time ago.

Erwin’s a gaping hole in the room. Shaking, Levi shifts his gaze to the other men. “I don’t know what the fuck you’re on, but don’t tell them I ever left.”

“What we’re on?” Mike says, incredulous. “You’ve spent the night scampering through a vent!”

The ground spins. Levi clenches a rung of the ladder to keep from keeling over. “I don’t - fuck - just, I was here the whole time. Got it? I never fucking left.”

Jean crosses his arms. “You’ve gone mad. The captain’s gone mad.” He runs a hand through his hair. “Just this once Ackerman. But we’re not back there anymore. You’re on your own in - whatever the fuck you’re playing at.”

The metal creeks under Levi’s fingers. Then the door bursts open.

It flies free so violently that it crashes into the wall. “Out, all of you!” A guard orders. 

Levi lags behind the others. As they file out, he slides the grate back over the vent with his toe. It’ll hold up from a distance.

The guard shoves him forward as he passes through the doorway. Levi glares, but lines up alongside everyone else in the hall. His shoulder brushes another.

He glances up at Erwin, but Erwin’s eyes are fixed firmly to the opposite wall. He clenches his fists and drops his gaze.

A guard steps up to the front and walks along the line. “Alright everyone, that was the alarm for the fire drill. Some computer shit short circuited and started spewing smoke.”

Everyone just blinks at the guard. He sighs and shakes his head. “That gibberish doesn’t mean anything to you, but now we have to do a routine check. Please turn around and put your hands on the wall.”

Levi’s the last to comply. He glances down the row where guards are patting people down and rifling through their pockets. The contents of his own grow heavy as rocks.

Hard hands pat up and down his sides. His muscles clench, fury boiling in his gut. When the fingers reach his pockets, his stomach drops.

The guard finds the scalpel first and pulls it from his trousers. Levi twists his head as the guard inspects it. He tucks it into his vest before reaching for the next pocket.

Levi searches under the row of arms and finds Mikasa looking his way. He narrows his eyebrows as intensely as possible. The guard’s fingers snake towards the photo.

A thud breaks the silence, followed by a wail of a cry. Levi shoots his gaze back to Mikasa as the guard’s fingers retract. Another guard clutches his gun in one hand and the wall with his other.

“Bitch,” he spits. “What was that for?”

“I don’t like where you put your hands,” Mikasa says. The guard behind Levi takes a step away from him.

“No one else is complaining, Miss Ackerman,” he calls over. Then he moves onto Erwin.

Once the guard is finished (Erwin being the last in line), the guard pats the pocket in which he put the scalpel. “Come with me, Ackerman.”

He turns to the rest of corridor and speaks louder, then. “As for the rest of you, return to your dorms for now.”

As everyone shuffles back into their rooms, Levi trudges after the guard, breathing heavily through his nose. After turning just one corner, they come to a halt. Levi roots his feet to the floor.

The guard rounds on him. “Where did you get this?”

Levi purses his lips. The guard raises his arm and smacks him across the face.

“Have used it for anything?”

He remains silent. The steel fist delivers another blow and blood splatters across the white wall.

“Where were you last night?”

“The dorm-“

The final blow sends Levi to his knees. Fire rekindles along old bruises; he’s tired of seeing purple. He braces his palms on the floor.

“I’ll have to report this to Doctor Ashley,” the guards says, then turns on his heels and disappears down the corridor.

Levi watches the blood collect a pool on the smooth floor. It runs to his hand and outlines his fingers in scarlet.

Suddenly a hand bunches in the back of his shirt and pulls him upright. His feet dangle uselessly until they find purchase on the floor. Levi looks up to find Erwin, already striding back down the corridor.

He catches up to Erwin’s shoulder and follows him silently back to the dorm.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you don’t understand what’s going on then that’s because-  
> Nope, I don’t know either. Hel p

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m writing a new fic and so I was wandering if Erwin’s father’s name is ever mentioned? Please comment if you know :))

Mission 10; the reason they were in the simulation. Why did the doctors tell them they didn’t know each other before? Why would they lie about a ‘military enrolment scheme?’

_Levi_

What went wrong on the mission? What failure could possibly warrant shoving them in a batshit simulation?

_Levi_

Did the superhuman trials fail? Levi was a success, but then there’s Mikasa, Eren, and Armin too, with the freshest of all the implants.

_Levi_

In the simulation, it was Levi’s powers which awakened first. Then Mikasa. And then Eren transformed into a titan. And finally Armin ...

“Levi!”

He jerks his head up, neck cracking. Erwin is frowning down at him, leaving his food untouched.

“Finally. I thought you’d died with your eyes open.”

Levi clenches the photo in his pocket and scowls at Erwin. The half moons under Erwin’s eyes are purple in the canteen’s light. “I’m just tired.”

“I’m sure you would be,” Erwin says. “After crawling around the cieling all night like a mad rat.”

Levi drops his gaze and stares at his plate. The porcelain is chipped at the rim. A group that has finished selecting their tasteless meals bustle over with their trays. Nanaba leads the pack and, as usual, heads for his and Erwin’s table.

But just before she can set down her tray, Mike reaches out and grabs her shoulder. He tugs her back and whispers something close to her ear. She nods, shooting a wary gaze back to Levi before moving to another table. Mike lingers to eye him, but then quickly catches up.

“You should go sit with them,” Levi mumbles to his cutlery. Hange keeps throwing him curious glances from their spot beside Nanaba.

“I think it would be a little crowded,” Erwin says.

Levi pushes his pale food into a ‘10’ with his fork. “You’re on their side though, aren’t you?”

“There’s no sides, Levi. But my father worked on the simulation. I trust him. So if you don’t trust the doctors here, and if you don’t trust him, then I’m not sure if you -

“What? Not sure if I trust you ?”

Erwin’s eyes drop to the table. Levi sighs. The photograph’s edges slice his fingertips.

“Look, Erwin. There’s something I need to-“

“Good morning, everyone.” Ashley strides into the room, heels tapping over the smooth floor. “Your brain scans will continue today. We’ll have you in the same order as last time, please.”

Levi drops his fork to the table with a clatter. “Why don’t you just cut it open, whilst your at it?”

Erwin sucks in a breath. He doesn’t turn to watch Ashley’s reaction, keeping his gaze on Levi instead. The rest of the room follows suit, with some hurriedly whispering behind hands. They avert their gaze when their eyes meet Levi’s.

Ashley opens his mouth. Levi shoves his tray across the table and stands up. “I’m going for a walk.”

He strides through the aisle of silent tables to the only exit; the one Ashley blocks. The doctor wraps his wrinkly fingers around Levi’s wrist in the doorway. He leans closer, stale breath fanning Levi’s ear.

“I trust you won’t go too far.”

Levi snatches his wrist away before he breaks the doctor’s arm. Storming into the corridor, he tries to lose the guards keeping close on his tail. He spins through the winding corridors, clenching the photo tight between his fingers in the depth of his pocket. After the third turn, he crashes into a bundle of limbs.

Papers fly into the air. They drift slowly to the floor like scattered feathers. Levi shoots his displaced hand back into his pocket. The photo is gone.

He quickly looks up and finds Julia falling to her knees, her busy fingers fumbling over the floor to gather her papers into a pile. Levi crouches too and helps her sort the mess. The presence of the guards a few metres down the corridor sits heavy on his shoulders; Levi _has_ to be the first to find the photo.

Their fingers clash over a page, and Julia looks up. “Ah, sorry Levi. I was in such a rush and-“

She reaches for a page a little further away, where the corner of a smaller rectangle peaks out from underneath. Levi throws out his hand, but he’s too late. Julia already has the page between her fingers and she lifts it off the floor. “Oh, Levi...”

Her eyes fall upon the image. Levi stands, tensing like a rabbit ready to bolt.

Julia grasps him by the elbow and shoves him down the corridor, away from the guards. She calls down the hall to them, “tell the doctor I’ll do Levi first, since he’s already here.”

Levi tries ripping his elbow free, but the cruel fingers bury in the pressure point between his bones. Her nails dig into the muscles of his back as she herds him to her office. She pushes him through the door and slams it behind them.

He complied in the journey, weakened with shock. Now in the cage, he makes a break for the door.

“I was there,” she says into the bitter silence. The words root Levi’s feet to the floor. He doesn’t turn, leaving his back to stare Julia in the face. “You invited me. To the wedding.”

He turns, then. He raises an eyebrow, a shaking finger: _tell me. Tell it all._

“You argued for weeks. He wanted to make it special, white everywhere and no detail left unchecked. You wanted simple.” She runs a hand through her hair. “Of course _you_ did, Levi. The two of you came to a compromise in the end, thank god. I was beginning to think the wedding would be called off.”

Every uttered word pulls Levi closer, like her tongue tugs on an invisible rope; the end tied tight around his chest.

“You wore black. He could hardly wrestle you into a white suit without losing a finger or two.” She smiles, sweet lips tugged sad. “But you knew how to get your way. That’s how the wedding was allowed. The military higher-ups wouldn’t have it, until you proposed being the test subject for their superhuman trials. And the success you were.”

Levi looks at his plain hands, white and purple and crosshatched with scars. Nothing super. Nothing special.

“Doctor Ashley thinks your sentimentality holds you back.”

He jerks up his head. Julia’s forehead creases; a warning. “He’s not all wrong. If it wasn’t for Erwin, you’d be a ruthless killing machine. Perfect for the military.”

“What did they use me for?” He rasps, legs trembling. “Why am I here?”

The door rattles with a heavy knock. Levi jumps back, and the rope is snapped. “Just a minute!” Julia calls. “We’re nearly done!”

She closes the distance between them - hand hovering like she wants to reach out to him - and lowers her voice. “I know you’re confused.” _Putting it lightly._ “I don’t have time to answer your questions, but please don’t act rashly. Believe it or not, you’re safer in here.”

Levi shakes his head. Pounding again; the walls shake. “Doctor Michaels,” a gruff voice calls. “Hurry it up, you’ve got a candidate waiting.”

Julia does grab him, this time. But the touch is soft, careful; reassuring a wounded animal. “The world is falling apart, Levi. You’ve made enemies trying to save it. Out there, without your memory, you won’t survive.”

She fixes him in a fierce gaze, _Do you understand?_ before striding to the door. She yanks it open to reveal a guard. Connie springer stands beside the giant of a man. Julia greets them. 

“Ah, Connie. Sorry to keep you waiting.” But her eyes stay on the guard.

“Ashley says we’ve gotta be finished by 3pm,” the guard says. “Hurry it up.”

“I’ll do this thoroughly,” she informs. She turns back to Levi to beckon him out of the room. As Levi forces his feet through the door, Connie takes a step closer to the guard. His wide eyes follow Levi down the corridor.

“I’ll see you later,” Julia calls after him, less a nicety than a command. 

-

His throat closes around the shower’s steam. Erwin’s feet don’t poke beneath the adjacent stall. In fact, it’s completely empty; only the stall furthest from his houses an occupant. Better for his thoughts - the quiet helps when formulating plans.

_It’ll be Mikasa first, then. The rest will follow._

He shuts off the water, changes quickly, and heads back to the dorms. His drying was so brief that sticky heat plasters the cotton to his skin. He stops outside the first dorm and knocks raptly. When there’s no response, he tries again with more force.

“What is it?” Mikasa asks before the door’s even open. Levi peaks past her into the drab room.

“Is there anyone else in there?”

She narrows her gaze, but opens the door wider so he can step inside. “What do you want?”

Once inside, Levi shifts back against the door and presses his fingers to the cool metal. Mikasa reluctantly takes a step back. She folds her arms and leans her side against a bunk.

“We’re leaving,” he says.

“Sorry?”

“Soon. We’re getting out of here.”

“And who is we?” The corded muscles in her arms pull tight with strain. “You’re going to gather everyone up and waltz out the front door?”

“There’s more of us than them. I’ve started a plan and-“

She pushes off the bunk and glares down at him. “It’d be like following a wall-worshipper into a titan’s mouth. Maybe the others are right. You’ve gone insane.”

Levi pushes his fists into the door. The steel begins to cave and bend under his bones. “Whoever doesn’t want to come can stay the fuck behind. Just listen, alright? There’s a fire alarm,” he’d seen the guards pretend to fiddle with it after the ‘fire drill.’ Levi’d checked on the way here; _push for alarm._

“When they lock the dorms at night, I’ll climb through the vents and get the alarm.” He shakes off the hair plastered to his forehead. “With the distraction, we can find an exit. The doors’ll have to open during the drill, so whoever wants to follow you can come along.”

“‘Whoever doesn’t want to come can stay the fuck behind?’” Mikasa shakes her head in disbelief. “I presume you’re expecting Erwin to follow your plan, then? You never used to be this stupid.”

“I’m doing what’s best. There’s no point prolonging it.”

“You’re being desperate.”

“Fucking stay behind them.” Levi spins around and reaches for the door, but his hand is sweaty and slips right off the handle.

“Levi.”

He finally shoves down the handle and moves to slide open the door. His grip glides over the metal.

“ _Levi._ ”

“You’re just like the rest of them, aren’t you?” He jerks a finger to the wall, gesturing to their invisible comrades. “They want to believe anything’s better than the walls.”

“I want to stay here about as much as you do. But Eren can’t leave, and Armin won’t.” She steps foreword and coils her thin fingers around his wrist. When Levi tugs away, she grips tighter. His joints click under a hold too strong to be human. “I won’t leave. Not whilst he’s still here.”

“Let me go.”

“If I do you’ll run.”

“ _Let me go_.“ His knees are failing, weakening like wet land before a slip.

She gives him a shove. “And you think Erwin will follow?”

As his legs give out, there’s a second of weightlessness. It reminds him of flying; the thrill of Erwin chasing him through the underground, his first titan kill. The bird Isabel released into the sky.

“I don’t know what’s real,” he breathes out. A drumbeat pounds his temples, turning his voice to a whisper. Mikasa is saying something, but her voice is muffled like he’s dipped his head into a bath. Her legs sway before him. 

“The walls were real. I could touch them.” Levi looks down at his rippling palms. “I can’t touch him. It isn’t him.”

He clutches his head in his hands and tries to tear the pounding out. The beat is heavy like footfalls and horsehooves and the titans that shook the ground. And he’s shaking, too.

Mikasa has him by the shoulders. He fixes his gaze on her shrunken pupils as she rattles his skeleton; _back forth back forth._

“Snap out of it, Levi.” She finally let’s him go after a wary gaze. “Go back to your dorm. _Stay there_ , and sleep it off.”

Levi gets to his feet, though he can’t really feel them. He floats out the door and drifts back to his own room. Erwin has returned to his own bunk, sitting up top, hands empty of papers and knees pulled up. Levi suddenly remembers to check his pocket.

It’s empty. He’d forgotten to get the photo back off Julia in his hurry. Erwin spares him a glance as he soundlessly sits down on his mattress and lies down.

After a moment, a hand lands upon his shoulder, and a thumb brushes over the nape of his neck. The touch is weightless and his skin numb; Levi might have just imagined it.


End file.
